Tuesday, November 05, 2013

Keep Strong

I have learned that no one can comment on how it feels to lose a loved one!  Sure we can all assume one should be moving on or doing one thing or another, but I have learned that each individual has to deal with grief in their own way.  Just think about it for a moment.  If a loved one is sick, then each journey is completely different from someone's else who is facing illness.  Each cancer journey is different as one patient may be able to withstand the side effects of a cancer drug very differently then another.  That's the way our body chemistry is made up.  We are all individual's and our emotions and the way in which we deal with events are very, very unique to each of us.  Thus, facing the loss of a loved one and in my case, a spouse, has to take time.

The best advice I could give anyone who may be grieving is to take your time and don't make any rash or hasty decisions.  Why would you?   It may feel right to decide on one thing today, but as time passes, you may realize that you have made a big mistake.  A situation that cannot be reversed or changed...so take your time.  Pretty much everyone has given me advice on how the "firsts" of everything, when a loved one passes, is difficult.  That would be the first birthdays, anniversaries, Christmas, etc.  Right now, even though I do find those "firsts" difficult, I'm sure I will continue to have the same feelings in two, five or ten years from now.  Another common remark that I have heard is "oh yes, I know how you are feeling because I felt the same way when I lost someone".....I just let that go way over my head because they don't have a clue how I feel.  Excuse me for being rash with that comment, but it is very true.  While I know they meant well, why keep saying it every time we are together? 

One of my husband's words was "FAITH".  Such a small word but one that can be so profound.  We all must have faith in our daily living to face what lies ahead.  Without faith, there is little to hold on to. 

I trust that whatever adversity you are facing today, that you will face it with FAITH, courage and strength.  When I am having a difficult day, I look around and realize that many others are going through tragic situations and that I am not the only one who has to deal with loss.

Keep strong, keep the faith and make each day a special one!


Monday, October 28, 2013

Return of My Blog

Today I decided to get my blog up and running.  Last time I posted was March 2012, quite a long time.  Thanks to those who have continued to check in, even though I have not been updating.

Quite a lot of changes have occurred since last March.  My husband sadly passed away a little while ago and as you can imagine, it has taken time to deal with all of the emotions that go along with the passing of a loved one.  He was such a courageous man, always willing to try whatever was offered but in the end, after many months of continued ill health, his body just could not overcome his illness.  For those of you who have been followers of my blog and may be cancer patients, please do not give up your fight.  Cancer is like any other chronic disease.  You may not be cured, but there are always options so you can never quit.

Looking back throughout my husband's illness, they originally gave him only 3 months to live back in 2006, so we have much to be thankful for that he lived almost another 7 years.  We have a lot of memories to cherish, lots of photos and videos and throughout those 7 years, we came to realize the true meaning of love which in itself, is such a blessing.

I hope to continue to keep in touch through my blog with other cancer patients, as well as those who also have lost loved ones.  We can all support each other, no matter what our circumstance may be. 

The format of this blog has changed over the past months so it will take me a few days to figure out these changes and revamp, so stayed tuned because I will be back.